The Summons of that which has passed

Wow

Thu, 30 Apr 2009 00:04:11 GMT

So, this thing has sat idle for quite the long time and it seems I only ever write when something has gone horribly and horrifically wrong.

Well not one to not please my audience, some things have gone horribly and horrifically wrong, but at the same time some things have gone very very right.

I'm now down to only 3 living relatives as the past year has seen me bury more dead than most see in a lifetime. My grandmother actually died on Christmas Morning after I'd finally finished body work on her cherry red 2007 Mustang, so there's a bit of irony for you. The gift I'd prepared in secret for her she never got to see.

However in the mire I've been stuck in I am currently looking for work with the Department of Defense as an Internal Affairs officer. The reason for this? Well I'm no longer as depressed as I once was and I'm looking for a place of my own.

Those of you who have spoken to me in these past couple of weeks have seen the change and know why.

321-917-6968 That's my new number for those who have lost touch.

Hopefully I will be protecting your freedom, one bit of tasteless sarcasm at a time.

Ir's a Long Hard Road...

Sat, 23 Jun 2007 19:22:37 GMT

Cheers all,

It’s been a hell of a long time since I’ve posted here and I have a few things to get off my chest. I’ve frankly been sick for quite some time in dealing with my family and trying to keep it all together. For my own health and frankly to keep myself from deteriorating further, I’ve come to a rather tough decision.

Tomorrow, I’m going to be getting on a flight to Newark, New Jersey. I’ll be flying there to move into an apartment for a while and enroll in a local university. I’m hoping that this move centers me, and helps me to get a bit better.

The long and short of it is folks, I’ll be leaving for a bit, my email is:

sanctum.absinthe@gmail.com

I would be honored if we could keep in touch. I’ve made good friends here and they’ve all tried in their own ways to hold me together when I felt I was falling apart. You’ve all seen some of the problems I’ve had and the effects they’ve had on me and I’m well and truly thankful.

I’m trying to get this done and hopefully it’s a success and I can get my life started finally after living for others for so long.

I’m thankful for your friendship, all of you that I’ve known and you’ll all hold a special place in my heart.

I’ll be stopping by the Wizard’s Wall if I can get some time free from packing. I love you all guys, and may our roads meet again.

Wisdom Teeth for the lose

Tue, 05 Sep 2006 17:08:55 GMT

Hey all,

Seems like quite a bit since I’ve posted here so here’s an update on things as I think of it.

Home life is going smoothly for the first time in a long time. My sister is attending a private school and I’m helping pay for that while she slowly becomes a young woman. Its kinda frightening since I remember when she was just learning how to crawl and now she has a steady boyfriend.

As for me, currently working in an attempt to gather money so I can start schooling. I want to be a psychologist or an engineer. Psychology appeals to me in that, physician heal thyself kinda way. Engineering, appeals to me due to the nature of just figuring things out and playing with tools.

My mom is well medicated and seems to be stable for the time being, she has bouts of depression but those are quickly gone.

I have good friends who wish they could see more of me and for that I’m truly sorry, balancing everything with contact with actual people is something I’ve never quite mastered.

I am actually thinking of quitting my job because the drive is simply not worth it anymore. I feel like I’m burning myself out and driving to Miami daily is quite the commute.

Currently, I think I’m going to be staying home these next couple days since the last of my wisdom teeth have decided to come in and they don’t have enough room it seems. Dull pain, almost constant, kinda sucks.

Treemonkey and Liz, my best to the both of you!

Allyssa grats on turning 20 and remember, growing older is mandatory, growing up is optional.

Kelly? Since the pirate quiz says I’m your first mate, who do I keelhaul?

Take Care all, I left work early due to the toothache and I hope my dentist returns my call.

Hidenplainsight is still more evil than I am...must rectify this...

Fri, 07 Jul 2006 09:36:54 GMT

You Are 76% Evil

You are very evil. And you're too evil to care.
Those who love you probably also fear you. A lot.

How Evil Are You?

Tue, 06 Jun 2006 01:31:40 GMT

If I were God over LiveJournal... by shinikami
Username
Jesus would be	mvirgilteach
The four archangels would be	dominant_zoe
and	thegamer43
and	puzzeled
and	godma
The Blessed Virgin would be	idontgooutmuch
Satan would be	hidenplainsight
The antichrist would be	wisdominsilence
And YOU would be	Immortal

Quiz created with MemeGen!

Well clearly through some dark bargain with hidenplainsight for help with his move, he gifted me with immortality...or something lol.

Sun, 12 Feb 2006 16:41:44 GMT

If I were God over LiveJournal... by shinikami
Username
Jesus would be	mvirgilteach
The four archangels would be	treemonkey75
and	somedeva
and	puzzeled
and	hidenplainsight
The Blessed Virgin would be	jesterlou
Satan would be	wisdominsilence
The antichrist would be	ucf12step
And YOU would be	A saint

Quiz created with MemeGen!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Guilt	What is yours?	Explain yourself
Culinary:	Rare Beef	I have no idea why this is the the bloodier a cut of beef is the better. It's always been this way for me and I have found very few places where I can get a true black and blue in Florida, maybe I'm just not looking hard enough.
Literary:	Romance Novels	glares So the cynic in me wasn't always that way, some part of me tends to smile when I read of true love being real.... makes shooing motions
Audiovisual:	B Horror Films	Something about watching a campy horror movie fills me with glee, bad acting, special effects and a horrid plot somehow come together to make one silly whole. Those movies that are so bad they're great and become cult classics.
Musical:	Loud Music (esp. Death Metal or Hard Rock)	When most of your life is a chaoitc whirlwind at the best of times, you learn to think better while being bombarding with input. For me, the louder the music and the more violent it sounds, the better I think.
Celebrity:	Tim Curry	The man plays the best villains I've seen and something about him and his mannerisms just seems to scream "cartoony villain". The illusion would be complete if he had a handlebar moustache to twirl the ends of. It's just so entertaining to watch him be foiled.

Now I tag:-

treemonkey75 somedeva oneearrabbit stgabriel and puzzeled

to complete this same Quiz, Its HERE.

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Update to follow later today :)

Yay Home Improvement :(

Tue, 17 Jan 2006 16:22:31 GMT

Good Morning all,

Just using the small break I’ve taken for lunch/breakfast to eat and do a quick post.

Currently my busy spell for the week has begun, as I’m now having to repair the unbelievably slapped together and fubar’ed wire job the cable guys did. They cut off any lines leading to the antenna we had outside so I get to do more wiring without my glasses, but my grandfather dropped in on Saturday and is staying for a bit so he’s helping. Here’s to hoping I can see well enough to not shock myself.

The weekend was alright, although I seem to be able to get to sleep, I get no rest from it so I tend to be very spacey. I went to the Wizard’s Wall for a bit and participated in the capitalist machine and talked to a few people whom I hadn’t seen properly in a while. I’m trying to get more free time but things seem to not want to gravitate towards it unfortunately.

Today, in an effect to help my sister cope with her only real authority figure losing it, I have been volunteered to take her to cheerleading practice, same goes for Thursday. Oh joy…I also get to pick her up from school, and well it’s not that I don’t like her friends but I can’t see why she would waste her time on them. She’s also become an object for attraction for some of the male members in her class…therefore big brother instincts go off and I get all growly. Considering my hair is died blood red, I’m usually finishing a smoke when she walks out, am dressed all in black…etc, means that I scare most of them off. Although if their intentions were pure, why would they have any reason to be on edge? I guess I’ll never know. That and she loves gangsta rap, and so do all her friends which means I spend most of the time fighting over the radio.

Fred, Kelly, Demian, Arianna, Allyssa, and even JT :) missing you all horribly and am struggling to get life to budge up off my free time. Another thing about being an adult that you never see when you’re younger, the “freedom” adults seem to have to do whatever they want doesn’t exist.

ivyriver have fun in basic, I’ll be writing you later on this week to see how your first few days went. hidenplainsight maybe when you’re feeling up to more peoples we can go shoot pool. I think it’ll be fun. :)

Alrighty all, time to gets going and get something more substantial than a Guinness in me before I go back to working on the wiring.

Cheers all.

Damn computer...

Wed, 11 Jan 2006 10:35:46 GMT

Also since I have my sister's compy to use, I am debating getting WoW since for some reason getting my old mmorpg to work is an exercise in how many expletives I can say in different languages in a single breath.

The WoW...she spreads...like ze plague....

Feeling Old...

Wed, 11 Jan 2006 10:26:46 GMT

Well, cheers folks, it’s very early morning right now and I actually have time to sit down and take a bit of time to myself. It’s been both better and worse since my last post and I’ll go into a bit of what’s happened since then. My sister’s cramps are largely under control however I did have to go talk to her cheerleading coach since for some reason my sister is quite embarrassed about that sort of thing. How me talking on her behalf makes it any better is beyond me however it needed to get done so she’s feeling a little better and is excused from practice for the next few days.

Ivyriver, the warmth solved the worst of her problem rather quickly and I bought her some Midol so she’s doing much better.

I also got to have several uncomfortable conversations with said younger sibling about my preferences in certain areas of my life. I have never felt so undeniably old in all my life. She is a rather sweet kid but whereas I had to grow quickly in some areas due to my upbringing, she has been completely sheltered. She has also been almost completely brainwashed and since she has seen past the mask my mother puts forth, I have become her anchor. This is very unsettling to me, because at times I have a 13 year old shadow asking rather uncomfortable questions.

The first topic of discussion and the one that she deemed most important was the fact that my mom had her convinced I was going to go to hell. My mom and sister are both staunch Catholics and I am not, so when she timidly approached me with the heating pad I had given her wrapped in place, and asked I didn’t have time to pick my reaction carefully.

I of course, did something that in hindsight was monumentally stupid but it was my first reaction…I caught the clove as it fell from my lips and laughed, exhaling the smoke in a rush. I immediately saw the beginnings of tears in her eyes and once I put out my cigarette in the ash tray and asked her why she thought so.

Apparrently because I have not accepted Jesus Christ, smoke, drink on occasion, and have a few other habits that she mentioned, I was clearly going to hell. I had to calmly explain to her about how it was impossible for me to go to a place I did not believe in and shared my beliefs with her.

It took the better part of three hours to walk her through the basics of Santeria, a derivative of the Voudoun practices most prominent in Haiti and New Orleans. It seemed to calm her somewhat but the blind faith in her eyes as she recited what my mother told her shook me. Seeing that slight naiveté and carte blanche belief disturbed something that I had worked to repress.. I wondered how long before the world wore away that shiny exterior and she was just as jaded as everyone else. I watched her for a long time and then smiled with a happiness I didn’t really feel and to9ld her to go get her homework since she had a few projects due while I washed her bedding and cooked dinner.

That was the evening, my afternoon was spent buying a few groceries, changing some belts in the truck since it was making a rather odd squeaking noise, and cleaning it out since it was my grandfather’s before it was mine. You’d be surprised at how much stuff someone can accumulate in a car.

I also did a few rituals that I’ve neglected in the past few months and felt some of that restlessness I’ve been possessed of ease.

Hopefully I’ll be getting out more guys, I miss you all however sometimes I don’t feel well enough for public consumption. Since most of you care, it makes it rather difficult to sort out my thoughts since it usually takes a minute or two of me staring off into space with a thoughtful expression on my face before I’m asked if something is the matter.

There is a bright spot in all this, my grandfather’s physical therapy is going well however he can’t work the way he used to until it is complete. This has him frustrated since his left hand still has a few tremors and he’s lost a bit of his dexterity. Telling a carpenter he can’t use one of his hands has to be a crushing blow. I’m just trying to keep him from slipping into depression as is my grandmother.

So yes, jesterlou, the hanging out will commence soon but not with a date….so I can surprise this mysterious “we” that is missing me :)

ivyriver, love you lots as well darlin’ hoping that I get to see you before you head out, thanks again for the advice.

deltadream, *huggles* thanks lovie, things aren’t completelyy fixed but I’m handling it.

somedeva, thanks for the prayers love, sometimes a little faith can accomplish something wondrous.

hidenplainsight, you still hold my bracelet hostage….I like the government do not negotiate with terrorists, expect Bruce Willis or oneearrabbit to rappel down the front of your home and reenact an action film…whomever I can convince first =P

Good day to you all, my duckies.

Damnit all to hell....

Mon, 09 Jan 2006 15:26:42 GMT

I've got some spare time between the running of errands and I'm also trying to adjust to the amount of bright light being up this early can subject you to. So, here I sit, a haze of cigar smoke around me, disgusting habit I know but it calms my nerves after a rather hectic morning and last night.

I didn't get to go see New Year's Revolution even though I actually felt like spending time with the peoples, however nature decided I had better things to do. My sister, blossoming into adulthood with all the grace that is due, has had her monthly visitor again and due to my mom's general ineptitude she was feeling miserable. I don't know if this is true but do all women get such horrific cramps at first or should I think about having her see a doctor?

In any case, due to the cramps I just put her back to bed this morning. She was trying to get up but her heart wasn't in it. I played the role of triage and general, sympathetic male by doing my duty and getting her chocolate, a couple DVDs she wanted from Blockbuster, a box of pads she was in dire need of and generally trying to make her as comfy as possible.

This morning I didn't bother going to sleep and got dressed and drove myself to my 8:15 optometrist appointment. My eyes are steadily going to pot, although I haven't lost any more ability to differentiate color but I need a new prescription since my distance vision has gotten slightly worse. They also did whatever bloody test it is that dilates your pupils for awhile so I'm kind of light blind being mildly photosensitive as it is.

Other than that I've got to do some grocery shopping while my mom's at work and all that so best wishes to you all.

This being responsible thing is getting on my nerves lol. :)

Fri, 06 Jan 2006 21:57:03 GMT

Sith Candidate
Your Polar Value is 79.

Your personal inclinations ultimately draw you toward the "Dark" side of the Force. Scores approaching 100 demonstrate the strongest of inclinations in this direction.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 92% on Polar Value

Link: The Force Polarity Test written by doodle-doot on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Well peoples, what's up with you guys in livejournal land. I'm just making a quick update now to relax a bit since I have some free time. My mom has taken her meds and is watching Oprah, my sister is in the kitchen doing her homework and I'm here looking over a whole lot of paperwork.

The first set has my stepdad's signature on it already and would name me as my sister's legal guardian as well as let the state give me a helping hand and that's about as far as I've gotten in reading it. The second set is the Registration information and other insurance papers for the truck I've received from my grandfather. Gettting a job will be infinitely easier now however I don't wanna do much with it until the thing is bloody insured.

I'm currently faced with one of three decisions:
1) Move back home and play parent to my mom and sister both.
2) Accept guardianship and stay in the same house.
3) Accept guardianship of my sister and move out, although if I did I would prefer to be as far away as I can manage.

Then of course there's always option 4 but I'm not enough of an ass to take it.

4)Fuck this noise, leave it all in the dust and let her fend for herself.

It's rather disheartening to see something happening to someone you care about that has happened to you in the past. It is also easiest to recognize in others the wounds you also bear.

So, I guess regardless of what I do, I have to be the adult and take care of my sister...until she's 18 anyway, then she can choose to go her own way.

Sometimes the definition of being an adult is making decisions you don't want to and trying to make it all work out for the best with what you've got.

I'm told that ten years from now this will seem like cake comparatively. :)

Now for a random bit of quotage/rantage from me at a party:

"Every time you open a pack of cigarettes you are asking yourself and the univers at large a question. That question is, "Do I really wanna live to be 90?". By removing a cigarette and lighting up you are answering that question with, "Fuck no, that's when all your organs fail." "

Sometimes a little vice and posion are necessary to allow you an escape so that the world will seem just a bit shinier when you get back. We wouldn't know what darkness was if we didn't have light to compare it to.

Cheers all, gonna go cook dinner and then maybe stargaze once the sun sets. :)

Random Quiz between hospital visits

Tue, 27 Dec 2005 01:03:35 GMT

The seducer of the night. You are the Faerie of
Darkness. You do things your own way. People
are toys to you, and you like to mold them to
do what you want. You have a lot of friends, or
a lot of people who consider you a friend(or a
lover). People are drawn to that wild smile of
yours, and your promise to allow them to enjoy
life. Ignoring the consequences... You live for
risks. Even if the risk is breaking someones
heart.

What's your inner Faerie?
brought to you by Quizilla

I found this rather amusing...

Thu, 15 Dec 2005 15:46:30 GMT

	The Twelve Days of Christmas for keeper_of_bones:

Day #	Who?	What they got you

1st	godma	a TiVo full of porn
2nd	dominant_zoe	a gigantic penis in your yard, drawn in flaming gasoline
3rd	puzzeled	an invitation to the first ever zero-gravity space orgy
4th	oneearrabbit	A creepy sexual poem that they wrote in 2nd person narration
5th	treemonkey75	A prepaid phone card to your favourite 1-900 number
6th	psychcfyre	a full-body condom
7th	effex100	a gigantic vagina in your yard, drawn in flaming gasoline
8th	wisdominsilence	an inverse restraining order, requiring you to be 'coupled' at all times
9th	idontgooutmuch	a keg of lube
10th	pen_dragon	a pubic hair trimmer
11th	puzzeled	A forty pronged whip for lashing all of your friends
12th	wisdominsilence	a dildo

Take this Quiz at QuizUniverse.com
( or, take the 'clean' version at QuizGalaxy.com )

Wed, 07 Dec 2005 16:42:01 GMT

Androgynous
You scored 83 masculinity and 70 femininity!

You scored high on both masculinity and femininity. You have a strong personality exhibiting characteristics of both traditional sex roles.

My test tracked 2 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 94% on masculinity

You scored higher than 74% on femininity

Link: The Bem Sex Role Inventory Test written by weirdscience on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Fri, 04 Nov 2005 20:53:42 GMT

You scored as William Wallace. The great Scottish warrior William Wallace led his people against their English oppressors in a campaign that won independence for Scotland and immortalized him in the hearts of his countrymen. With his warrior's heart, tactician's mind, and poet's soul, Wallace was a brilliant leader. He just wanted to live a simple life on his farm, but he gave it up to help his country in its time of need.

</td>

William Wallace

92%

Captain Jack Sparrow

83%

Neo, the "One"

83%

Lara Croft

83%

Maximus

79%

Batman, the Dark Knight

79%

Indiana Jones

75%

El Zorro

67%

The Amazing Spider-Man

63%

The Terminator

58%

James Bond, Agent 007

50%

Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0
created with QuizFarm.com

Passing the Time

Thu, 03 Nov 2005 15:19:35 GMT

Fire - Dominant

You're a very
confident and passionate person... You are a
warrior and will fight for those you
love...

Animagi form:
Phoenix
Most compatible with:
Air
Least compatible with:</b>
Water
Song: Angel -
Aerosmith
Ruling God: Ares

Are you an Obscure or Dominant Element?? {Great pics}
brought to you by Quizilla

Real Update coming soon...for now a survey

Tue, 06 Sep 2005 17:21:50 GMT

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF I?.....
i came to you in the middle of the night::
i said i loved you::
i kissed you::
i moved next door to you::
i started a bad habit::
i gave you my heart::
i was hospitalized::
i took a bullet for you::
i got into a fight and you werent there::

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY::
personality::
eyes::
hair::
family::

WOULD YOU::
be my friend?::
keep a secret if i told you one::?
hold my hand?::
tell me that you loved me if you did?::
keep in touch?::
listen and help solve my problems?::
love me?::
date me?::

HAVE YOU EVER::
kissed me and ment it?::
wanted to kiss me?::
wanted to kiss me over and over agin?::
won my heart?::
keep some thing important from me?::
thought i was hott?::

1.who are you?
2.are we friends?
3.when and how did we meet?
4.describe me in one word?
5.what was your first thought of me?
6.so you still have thought like that about me now?
7.what reminds you of me?
8.if you could give me any thing what would it be?
9.how would you tell me that you liked me?
10.when was the last time you saw me?
11.ever wanted to tell me some thing but you couldnt?
12.are you going to put this on yours to see what I say

Random Quizzology or "Look out! Here comes Spike!"

Wed, 31 Aug 2005 14:53:27 GMT

You scored as Spike. You are the strait up you knew what I was type what did you expect. There maybey some surprise personality quirks you have you. You try to control your emotions and sometimes fight so hard to deny them but when you do give into them you go all the way for what you want.

</td>

Spike

92%

Dracula

83%

Akasha

83%

Armand

75%

Marius

67%

Deacon Frost

67%

Lestat

67%

Blade

50%

Angel

42%

Louie

25%

Whose your Vampire personality? (images)
created with QuizFarm.com

And Now a Musical Interlude

Sat, 16 Jul 2005 00:04:27 GMT

[howls]

Who's that I see walkin' in these woods?
Why it's Little Red Ridin' Hood

Hey there Little Red Riding Hood
You sure are lookin' good
You're everything a big bad wolf would want

Listen to me [howl]

Little Red Ridin' Hood
I don't think even big girls should
Go walkin' in these spooky old woods alone

[howls]

What big eyes you have
The kind of eyes that drive wolves mad
So, just to see that you don't get chased
I think I ought to walk with you for a way

What full lips you have
They're sure to lure someone bad
So, untill you get to grandma's place
I think you ought to walk, with me and be safe

I'm gonna keep my sheep suit on
Till I'm sure that you've been shown
That I can be trusted walkin' with you alone

[howls]

Little Red Ridin' Hood
I'd like to hold you if I could
But you might think I'm a big bad wolf, so I won't

[howls]

What a big heart I have
The better to love you with
Little Red Ridin' Hood
Even bad wolves can be good

I'll try to be satisfied Just to walk close by your side
Maybe you'll see things my way
Before we get to grandma's place

Little Red Ridin' Hood
You sure are lookin' good
You're everything a big bad wolf could want

[howls]

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Hey all,
It seems as if I haven’t updated in awhile which for me is about normal. It is kind of hard to put things into writing when you’re having trouble figuring them out in your own head. I went to New York and found out a few things that I think are a bit of sage advice.

- No one can embarrass you if you don’t let them.
- Trees are necessary to balance, being surrounded by concrete tends to make you moody.
- Any injuries sustained to the physical shell, can and will be forgotten in the face of warm company and a bit of alcohol.
- Human expression is a many splendored thing and when the outside matches what dwells within, you’ll ultimately be happier.
- The first blow in a fight always hurts the most, you don’t need to worry however, your body is on autopilot and fighting for you while you reel.
- Nothing is quite as soothing as the night sky when seen from a tall place, such as a rooftop.

It’s been a few hard lessons learned that I needed in order to be able to function a bit. I’‘ve been reading a bit up on what exactly it is that may be wrong with me. I come from a bunch of people to whom actually admitting that you have a problem is a sign of weakness. So, if you ignore it then it doesn’t exist and voila no problem. I’ve lived about 16 years that way and while I’ve been fairly well adjusted for most of that time, a few things broke or were severely damaged by this lack of emotion.

You never quite forget some things when you’ve seen them. One of these images which is the culprit for some of my emotional wasteland is burned into my memory. I’m about 12 years old, and I’ve gone over to Carlos’ house, a good friend of mine. I hear a sound like thunder and then the running of feet, someone runs past me in the hallway and I rush in to see what’s wrong. Carlos is lying there, a hole the size of a silver dollar quickly filling with blood in his throat. It’s really quite amazing what happens to blood once the human body is damaged that severely. The blood just came faster as I tried to hold him in my lap and keep it from escaping. The image is still slightly unreal. I came later to find out that my best friend died because some other friend of ours was trying to prove how tough he was by bringing his daddy’s gun over. Later on, I got to watch my great grandmother die because, while she never would have wanted to live in that state, of the two people selected to make that decision, one was too aggrieved to make it. Then the blame that followed at “killing” her.

I visited both his and my great grandmother’s grave last night. I left flowers for them both and sat on the stones to watch the sky slowly shift in the fog that is the New York City skyline.

To those of you that gave advice, I’ve taken it and am working on a bit of a project. I’ve got several books and the Internet is an ever useful tool.

Frankly folks, if I seem skittish it’s because well, having no emotions and pretending like it’s alright has been my defense against everything. I am not invincible and I bleed just as bright as the rest of you, I just smile when I do because it feels right.

I may not be ready for the glittering throng that is large crowds, frankly that tends to force me back into bad habits, such as pulling back into the armor I’m so fond of. So if you’d like to talk and aren’t getting much of a response...I feel like a coward for saying this but, it’s because I’m afraid of what the interaction may bring. Not the interaction itself but the unknown and what might happen if I don’t have my security blanket of calm control and confident grin.

I’m getting better, by scraping tooth and nail, but it’s not easy and it sure as hell isn’t going to be fast.

I leave you now with a quote from a very wise person.

“I like you better when you’re frustrated...to be honest, you seem more.....like a person.”

You know who you are, and know that I’m grinning right now thinking of how that quote really affected me.

I’ll have more for you later this weekend folks, my trip to New York to see my brother didn’t go as planned, but then again nothing ever does. I still got the things I needed on this trip, however.
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Thu, 23 Jun 2005 15:20:12 GMT

You Are Subversion!
You are systematic and secretive. Sometimes even very calculating. Most everyone trusts you but they have no idea what really goes on in your head. You are capable of being nice or mean, whatever a situation calls for. You look out for #1.

What Naughty My Little Pony Are You?

Sun, 12 Jun 2005 17:48:54 GMT

Your wise quote is: "Our greatest glory is not
in never falling, but in rising everytime we
fall" by Confucius.
Yes indeed, you see true strenght can only be
seen when a person has "fallen". Only
then one can tell how they will handle it. Just
don't make others fall so you can know who they
really are. You on the other hand may be a very
quick recoverer and don't let people bring you
down. You are your own, and you're find with
that. Emotional issues is something you handle
rather nicely.

What wise quote fits you?(pics) UPDATED
brought to you by Quizilla

Pensive...

Fri, 10 Jun 2005 16:08:53 GMT

Take away the sensation inside
Bitter sweet migraine in my head
Its like a throbbing tooth ache of the mind
I can't take this feeling anymore

Drain the pressure from the swelling,
The sensations overwhelming,
Give me a long kiss goodnight
and everything will be alright
Tell me that I won't feel a thing
So give me Novacaine

Out of body and out of mind
Kiss the demons out of my dreams
I get the funny feeling, that’s alright
Jimmy says it's better than here,
I’ll tell you why

Drain the pressure from the swelling,
The sensations overwhelming,
Give me a long kiss goodnight
and everything will be alright
Tell me that I won't feel a thing,
So give me Novacaine

Oh Novacaine

Drain the pressure from the swelling,
The sensations overwhelming
Give me a long kiss goodnight
and everything will be alright
Tell me Jimmy I won't feel a thing,
So give me Novacaine

Sun, 05 Jun 2005 17:20:03 GMT

You are Asher! Once a golden god of the vampire
world, now you are forever scarred and ashamed
of your fallen glory. Though 'fallen' is a
matter or opinion. Nothing but sentiment holds
you where you are, if you wanted you could get
up and leave, go back to Belle Morte or find
some other master to take you in. But you're in
love and beginning to understand that you are
loved back.

Which Anita Blake Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Wed, 01 Jun 2005 21:52:51 GMT

You Are The Wayfarer Guide
"I'll show you the way."
Your deep insight and quick wisdom never ceases to amaze those around you. You are the guiding light for many of those you know and are not afraid to help anyone else who asks. Not very many acknowledge your tremendous help and effort, but you do not mind that so much. You've seen what is in store for them, and will be there should they need your help. You enjoy people in general, but are very selective of who you let see the real you. Others see you as an enigma of sorts, a mystery that is seemingly ever changing.

Which Classic Story Role Do You Play?
brought to you by Quizilla

Thu, 26 May 2005 01:07:18 GMT

The Fall Of The LJ Jedi

LiveJournal Username

So, what's your name, Jedi?

I see. What's your affiliation?

Good, good. What's your lightsaber color?

Finally, what's your fighting tactic most likely to be?

The Sith Lord who hunts all Jedi:

ivyriver

The Jedi Master who leads you into battle:

somedeva

The Leader of the Wookies:

oneearrabbit

The One that dies in the first 20 minutes:

northernminx

The Traitor who misleads you all:

houstin_hobby

Survivor #1

luminaluna

Survivor #2

luminaluna

The odds you'll survive this are:

59%

This Fun Quiz created by Jae at BlogQuiz.Net

Taurus Horoscope at DailyHoroscopes.Biz